Tuesday, September 30, 2008

As if the trip to work could get any worse.....

Sweet merciful crap.  Where have the days gone?

Yes, I apologize for the lack of commitment.  Me to blogging is as Tom Brady to fatherhood.  (Ah, Brady jokes....that felt good.)

I assume you are wondering what initiated the return to the world of typing to an audience of zero?  Well, it was this idiot right here:

It says here that Fen-Phen is most effective while being an uncivil slob.  Why does my chest hurt?

Consider this a companion piece to the WorldWideNetWeb's "Get to Know your Fellow Commuters" series.  Yes, the topic is unoriginal....but you can't expect my first post in months to be all thaaaaaat groundbreaking.  I'm not looking to shatter that glass ceiling that Hillary cracked....I'm just home alone, somewhat bored and halfway through a bottle of wine.

Back to the photo....you'll notice a stout woman taking up two seats during this morning's commuter rush on the TTC.  The display was way more obnoxious that the usual "my laptop is really heavy and needs it's own seat" crowd who we commuters usually have to deal with.  This peach decided that even with people standing everywhere, (some of whom were senior citizens) she needed a seat for her oversized ass, and another seat for her ham-hock legs crammed into knock-off Ugg boots.

I know you're not supposed to hit a person with glasses, but how about an inconsiderate sow-bag?  The reason I ask is because I really wanted to smack her, but I used better judgement and restrained myself.  Instead, I found myself questioning her obviously checkered upbringing and choice in oversized purses.  I'll let the purse thing slide, because how else are you going to get a 5lb frozen lasagna (aka lunch) to the office.....but what kind of person lacks the decency to realize that putting your dirty, wet boots where someone may want to sit is indefensible? 

As she waddled out of the car and up the stairs (probably on her way to buy a large diet coke) at Yonge Station, the seats were quickly filled again by people who were none the wiser.  Although I ran an 8% chance of being busted, and possibly charged, for taking this photo...I am glad I did it.  This kind of behaviour can not be forgiven or forgotten.  (It's somewhere between 9/11 and the Alamo, in my opinion.)  

Personally, I'm content with the knowledge that upwards of eight people may see this photo and know the true tale of what happened earlier today.  In a perfect world, the asshat above would read this post and realize that she should sit up straight....the subway isn't your own personal gurney at the overeaters anonymous VIP lounge.  Even better, I call on Councillor Adam Giambrone to ban her from the TTC.  At least it would make her get out and walk somewhere. The good Lord knows she could use it.

(Sorry if that was mean....she really was deserving of the insults.)

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