WWMRD - Making Love Happen Since Mid-2007

The world now knows that Bridget Moynahan named her kid, John Edward Thomas Moynahan. The world also now knows that Bridget Moynahan is awesome! Although it probably wasn’t intentional, I’d like to think that she named the kid J.E.T. Moynahan on purpose….just as a big F-U to the babydaddy, Tom Brady.

Bridget – If you REALLY want to stick it to Tom, then I have a proposition for you. You should take this one step further and start dating J.P. Losman. There is little doubt he would make a great father for little JET.

"Alright guys, once we are done with this tree, does anyone want to help me build a Bass Pro?"

I think that most would agree that this concept is both controversial and genius, (a bit like that Hardy Boys novel where they killed their parents, but ultimately it helped them solve the “Mystery of the Missing Allowance”.) The J.P. + Bridget = True Love concept was originally proposed by Steve Holt over at WorldWideNetWeb, I think it makes a LOT of sense.

For Bridget (and whoever else cares), I present the reasons she should date JP Losman:

1. First and foremost, JET needs a daddy.

2. Secondly, JP is a stand up guy. While your ex was out getting coked up with supermodels, JP is out bettering the community. Read about it here: Losman’s cleanup blitz comes up big

3. JP Losman throws a better deep ball that Tom Brady. Skills like that almost always transfer favourably to the bedroom.

4. JP Losman was named Buffalo’s ‘Most Eligible Bachelor’ by Forbes Magazine. He’s now 26, and is probably looking for a love match. No one wants to see him end up on “Confessions of a Matchmaker”. Patti Novak is mean, and would probably tell him to get a haircut.

5. JP is 6’2”. Tom is 6’4”. Clearly your selection of mid-size sedans would be greatly increased without having to worry about buying something to accommodate a 6’4” freak. (Rumour has it that Tom was just 5’4” until he started borrowing Bono’s shoes and hanging out with Dr. William Gogan down at the The Health and Rejuvenation Center).

6. Finally, you’d get to move to Western New York full-time. No doubt, this is a better option than living in Southern California. Since you’re not acting anymore, you’re probably watching your spending habits. Well, guess what? A dollar goes a lot further in WNY that it does in So-Cal. A pitcher of Bud at Kentucky Greg’s is $5.75. The same pitcher of Bud at Spago is $42.95…and at Spago you’d have to drink it in the company of a bunch of douchebags.

Is this enough to convince Bridget? Only Bridget knows. On the off-chance I’m not seeing paparazzi photos of Bridget leaving the Anchor Bar in the next couple weeks, I’ve got a back-up plan. I can’t tell you what it is exactly, but it will be patterned after Hilary Duff’s hijinks in her 2005 documentary, “The Perfect Man”.

Guess what today is!!!!

Today, July 25th, is the first day of Bills training camp. The first step in what should be, the good Lord willing, a Superbowl Championship season!

If there are any questions as to how awesome the Bills are going to be this year, let those questions be answered by the following video:



So, the Bills had the best Special Teams in the league last year, and they go ahead and add a player who has clearly been sent by the Lord. You hear that AFC East?!? That's John Wendling jumping over you.

In other AFC East news, Tedy Bruschi is not dead.....unfortunately.

http://www.thebostonchannel.com/news/13751337/detail.html

Actually, a dead Tedy Bruschi would be the WORST THING EVER! Why, you ask? Because Joe Theismann and the rest of the NFL media is for some reason in LOVE with Tedy Bruschi, a pretty average linebacker.

The best thing that could happen would be for Bruschi to play this year, have an average season, then fade away. If he were to die, there is a chance the NFL would disband. It would just be too painful. Actually, no...it would not disband, but it would end up changing the name of the 'Superbowl' to the Tedy Bruschi Memorial. All teams in the league would wear be forced to wear black uniforms in perpetuity.

Remember how Nirvana used to be an OK band? Cobain blows his head off, and now they are remembered as the voice of a generation, and 'Nevermind' is the greatest album of the past 25 years. If Bruschi dies, it would that much worse. There would be tributes every Sunday for the next 60 years. He would be remember as the man who invented football, tore down the Berlin Wall, walked on the moon and cured polio.....all during halftime of a game in which he registered 200 sacks!

I want to discuss his GARBAGE player of the week award in his comeback game a couple years ago....but I am just TOO ANGRY. TOOOOOO ANNGRRRRRYYYYY!

OK...back to the Bills. JP Losman (from now on referred to as Jesus P.) will hopefully be in fine form this season. Check out the video below. It is encouraging, but I have to disagree with the statement that the current Bills offense is looking a lot like the Rams of old. Lee Evans is as good as Tory Holt.....but Peerless Price/Josh Reed are no Isaac Bruce.